January always inspires reflections and goals, and this year was no exception. I took an unplanned hiatus in December and the start of the year to be with my dad, Harry, in the hospital for several weeks. Day by day, with no sense of time, my body and existence became a tool for his, which lacked speech or movement, to come back to life from a stroke. There was little I could control, so I smuggled him organic food, decorated his room, played his favorite films, and championed progress. He gradually began speaking, and now we can have a conversation. The chance to repay decades of his devotion in some way brought perspective.
I skipped the holidays, gift guides, events, and social media with ease and relief. Between all of this, the fires, and the political situation, going back to Europe for the men's shows this month (and a visit to Morocco) felt understandably different. Thanks for sticking with me here.
Focusing on clothes seemed frivolous, but it wasn't. Being with makers and designers who pour their livelihood into their work was uplifting. I was relieved by their consistency and confidence in enduring things. Everyone seemed more open and a bit vulnerable, even at big brands. It illuminated our community and how important it is to support each other. Calling my dad at the end of each day became the best part. He wanted every detail.
Last year, I started questioning New York's brand/media landscape—the branded dinners, influence, events, competition—and how I wanted to participate. It was all becoming compulsive and less impactful, even for luxury brands. I'm interested in connecting more humanly, in Milan or the desert.
In Morocco, we visited hotels in and outside of Marrakech. Royal Mansour was lavish and owned by the King of Morocco. But the low-key Berber Lodge in the desert represented my idea of luxury: tasteful, natural, and unfussy. I felt safe within its earth-clay walls and alive in its cold pool. Meals were simple: vegetables and fish served on green rattan tables across a meandering, Rohmer-esque lawn. Sunset walks over the desert hill felt primal, with the shepherd passing by. Other guests got the memo; they carried books and spoke softly. This simplicity allowed inner quiet and the feeling of something bigger.
I think about the meaning of luxury more than average. Many brands and experiences opt for opulence when less is always more. Luxury is discreet and without distraction. Slowing down is a luxury, spending time is a luxury, deep connection is a luxury, authenticity is a luxury, going offline is a luxury, supporting others is a luxury, and handmade is a luxury.
The most essential luxuries are about so much more: health, safety, community, friendship, family, nature, privacy, creativity, generosity, perspective, and security. These are worth investing in this and every year.
We'll dive into menswear next and these luxuries soon, too.
Welcome back, now that your father is on the mend. First things first <3
Vulnerable, soft spoken and kind humans, appreciating the handmade and spending time in soothing environments.
Lovely article.